Is being loyal blinding you?
Even as l turn 40 l am still learning things about myself.
Loyalty is one of my values l hold dear to myself, l pride myself on being loyal to those who l love and respect.
What l have learnt about myself recently is that loyalty can also be blinding.
What do l mean by this?
I loved being loyal, l loves showing support and l loved being on the team (let’s call it A) Team A.
When a comment was made, or a story was told l immediately would jump on Team A, because l was loyal. I would support Team A, like there was no tomorrow, the comments must be true, the stories must be correct. Because it came from Team A.
I would judge the shit out of what Team A has said - and all it was really doing was showing that l was not being a kind person, l was not showing compassion and l was not being the kind of person that l want my kids to be.
Loyalty is a great value to have, as long as you can see clearly and not put other people’s values onto what is being said.
What l am still learning and discovering every day is that everybody has a story, everybody is battling something in their lives. So who am l to place judgment on them or the situation.
You don’t know what people are battling behind closed doors, and if they chose to share it with you then respect them and not share it with the world. They are choosing you to talk to because they trust and respect you.
I have seen it in the gym culture over the many years l have worked in the fitness industry. ‘I go to this gym because my friend does, but the person really doesn’t like the space or the training space doesn’t work for them. But the person keeps going then starts to develop an unhealthy relationship with exercise because they aren’t moving for the right reasons for them.
Being loyal with a sprinkle of FOMO (fear of missing out) can also be confused at times. ‘Oh, l am doing this because l am loyal to my friend..’ The friend ‘oh she is here because she has epic FOMO!’
But are you really missing out? Most of the time NOPE!
I know for me, l am going to keep ‘not being blinded’ on my radar. It’s not the person that l want to be nor it is how l want to act. The funny thing is, when l look back at my many years, l have always done it.
It all comes back to - where there is a blessing there is a curse!
Keep being loyal, but keep it healthy and do it for the right reasons not to either A) to be part of the team or B) think you are missing out.
Keep being you because that’s who the world needs you to be!